Research

After a 2 year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on the American Male's recreational preferences:

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: basketball
2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: bowling.
3. The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is: football.
4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: baseball.
5. The sport of choice for middle management is: tennis.
6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: golf.

Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

Wife Husband

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the
other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of
the mouth.

Baba ji

Baba Ji ka dera bohot chamatkari hai. Sach mano vaha jo bhi koi buri niyat se jata hai, jalke bhasam ho jata hai.

Salman vaha gaya to bhasam ho gaya, Hrithik bhi bhasam ho gaya. Malika vaha gayi to…

….to anarth ho gaya….

Babaji jalke bhasam ho gaye!!!

गोल

शाम :- (फुटबाल के मैदानपर राम से ) - अरे ये लोग बार बार  ball  को क्यों मार रहे है ?

राम :- '' अरे वे लोग गोल कर रहे है ''
शाम : '' अरे ball  तो पहलेसे गोल है , और कितना गोल करेंगे ...............?

money in kitty

What happened when the cat swallowed a coin?
There was money in the kitty.

Great Indians

Indian Prime Minister: We are sending Indians to the moon next year!

US President: Wow! How many?

Indian Prime Minister: 7 OBC, 5 SC, 8 ST, 3 Handicapped, 2 Sports Persons, 3 Terrorist Affected, 3 Kashmiri Migrants, 2 MPs & 1 Astronaut.

डॉक्टर मरीज

डॉक्टर (मरीज से)- अब तुम बिल्कुल ठीक हो गये हो फिर भी क्यों डर रहे हो?

मरीज (डॉक्टर से)- जिस गाड़ी से मेरा एक्सीडेंट हुआ था उस पर लिखा था फिर मिलेंगे।

Biwi & Shohar

Biwi: “Aap ne pichle saal meri birthday pe mujhe lohay ka bed banwa ke diya tha, Iss dafa aapka kya iraada hai?”

Shohar: “Iss saal uss mein current chodne ka iraada hai.”

from many resources

A AND B

A: I'm in a big trouble!
B: Why is that?
A: I saw a mouse in my house!
B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.
A: I don't have one.
B: Well then, buy one.
A: Can't afford one.
B: I can give you mine if you want.
A: That sounds good.
B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap.
A: I don't have any cheese.
B: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap.
A: I don't have oil.
B: Well, then put only a small piece of bread.
A: I don't have bread.
B: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!

Teacher and Maria

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map.
Maria: This is it.
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?
Class: Maria did.

मरीज डॉक्टर

मरीज (डॉक्टर से)- डॉक्टर साहब क्या आप मेरी बीमारी का पता लगा सकते हैं।
डॉक्टर (गुस्से से)- हां तुम्हारी आंखें बहुत कमजोर हैं।
मरीज- आपको कैसे पता चला?
डॉक्टर- तुमने बाहर बोर्ड पर नही पढ़ा कि मैं जानवरों का डॉक्टर हूं।

Sardar ji in cyber cafe

Once sardarji entered a cybercafe to check his mails.It was crowded so he had to wait.As he waited he saw a man checking his mails.He stood behind him and watched.The man typed his password and was waiting when sardarji cried out "Yes yes I know your password.I can read your mails now.
"Surprised the man asked "Oh yeah, tell me what is it".
Sardarji replied " Five stars."

Kid and mother

Ek 10 saal ka bachha bahot dhyan se ek book pad raha tha, jiska title tha: “Kids ka paalan poshan kaise kare”.

Mother: Tum yeh book kyon pad rahe ho.

Kid: Main yeh dekhna chahta hoon ke mera paalan poshan theek tara se ho raha hai ya nahi.

Laloo Stamp

When Laloo completed 25 years of his rule over

Bihar, he wanted a special postage stamp with his picture on it. He asked Rabri, stressing that it should be world class. The stamps were released, and

Lalloo was pleased.

But within a couple of days, he began hearing

complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and became furious. He called Rabri and ordered her to investigate the matter. Rabri checked out at

several post offices, and then reported to Lalloo Prasad: She said: "The stamp is really world class. The problem is, our Biharis are spitting on the wrong side."

Sunil Gavaskar & Ravi Shastri

australia playing india at wankhede

gavasker enters the stadium

ravi and kapil greet sunny

hi sunny whats up ?

match goes on after a hour or so ravi turns to see sunny still standing so ravi hey why are u standing sunny what to do dude look there it says sunil gavasker stand

hockey and cricket

Q: what is the difference between hockey and circket?
Ans: hockey main team 1.5 hours main zaleel hoti hai
aur circket main 8 ghante main

sharaabi and his wife

A sharaabi knocks the door of his house.
His wife opens door.
Sharaabi asks: who r u?
Wife: "How dare u forget your wife?"
Sharaabi: nasha har gham ko bula deta hai

Disk full

Santa and Banta work in a software company. One day, they were to move their m/cs to another building. Banta was having a tough time carrying his machine.
Santa : "My m/c has 500 MB disk. See how easily I am carrying it. Yours has just 250 MB. Can't you carry even this much?"
Banta : "But yours is empty and my disk is full"!!!

Hutch Dealer

A lady delivered twins. Suprisingly one is a boy and another is a dog

how it is possible?

Because her husband is HUTCH DEALER ...... wherever u go out network follows.

kabhi khushi kabhi gham

osama bin laden asked shahrukh khan hows life

shahrukh said khabi khushi khabi gham

then shahrukh asked osama bin laden hows life and he said kabhi

goli khabi

bomb